A common scenario I encounter and despise:1. Woman and I make a commitment (time/understanding in friendship, a specific or general time for a date, etc.)2.
Woman breaks commitment because of emotional reaction or general screw up (dog dies, family dinner, forgets, moves other priorities forward in line)3.
I become upset (typically after repeat offenses)4. Woman shifts blame. (Her forgetting becomes > I am responsible, just busy. Her dog dies = I have feelings; you’re insensitive.
Family dinner/other social priorities push our commitment back = I JUST met you.)5. Men and women “victim shame”. (“You should know not to come on so strong.” - “People are busy; be patient.
” - “You’re insecure.”, etc.)(6. Isolation, feelings of anger, sadness, anxiety, self-doubt, defiance, apathy, etc.
increase)I think it’s easier if people get their shit together and keep their commitments, but that’s just me. The bottom line is: you made a commitment; you didn’t keep it. It’s your responsibility.
Apologize, reschedule, and don’t keep doing it…(And a “commitment” doesn’t have to be an official, written contract or specific time and date agreed upon - but that’s a topic for another post.)