There are certain things that only happen to me. It’s really funny to think about it you know… I have always said that I have bad luck.
At first I always asked “Why me?” “Why of all the things that could happen, THIS has to happen to ME?” But overtime it changed to “It could be worse” “It is not that bad”.
It even became funny to me to see all the little bad things that had been happening to me.
There is a point where bad things that are so stupid and ridiculous that it is funny to watch and you laugh it off cause literally that’s the only thing that you can do about it.
I eventually got used to bad news and bad things, so used that it really just became like a comedy for me. I called my life a tragic comedy cause it was funny but sad somehow.
I always lived with this mentality, you know, it helped me get through it, cause I may make a joke out of it but it was hard for me.
Anyways bad things where a normal thing in my everyday life until you came to my life and said “I know it may be funny but if you keep on living with that mentality bad things will always
keep on happening to you, it’s like you are calling them.” “You need to be positive to attract good things” and I thought about it.
And I eventually began to be more positive and I stoped saying I had bad luck or that my life was a tragic comedy.
I stopped saying it completely to the point where I just forgot about “my bad luck”. Everything was great, I mean it’s not like bad things didn’t happen but they were not that bad.
Until one day I received some news, news that made me angry, sad, desperate. “Why?” I said “why me?”. ‘The cycle started over again?’ I thought at first.
But no, the cycle never ended and it was always running, it never stoped therefore it couldn’t begin again.
I realized I was living in a bubble of positivity, which wasn’t a bad thing exactly, but it was fake. Too fake.
This bad news broke me, and I wanted to blame something, someone, hell I wanted to punch a wall and throw a chair at somebody but I didn’t,
instead I texted you “wow I just heard this…” hoping that somehow you could understand, hoping that somehow you would comfort me,
but you didn’t you just told me the reality “there’s nothing you can do about it”.
Thank you so much for helping me your words have somehow make me feel like all the hate from this world has vanished. I wanted to punch you in that moment don’t ask why I just wanted to.
“I know it is not the end of the world, but i am still mad, it makes me sad” i replayed… “i understand” you said and that was it, no “how do you feel?” “Are you okay?” nothing.
With you eventually I learned things where going to be like that.