I'm coming out of the shower doing a bit of a dance to the cranked up stereo. It's Saturday and I've got nowhere to go and the day belongs to me, everything is awesome.
As I'm heading to grab some clothes I do a little peacock preening in the mirror above the dresser only to discover a stress zit above my eyebrow.
This will not do on my most awesome day of days. Quickly leaning in I fail to notice one of the draws is slightly open.
As I lean in my knee pushes the drawer close, only problem is my dick and balls are hanging low.
Pain, instant pain, nothing but pain, inconceivable pain.
So an hour later I'm sitting here in front of reddit without pants (again) in the unusual position of trying not to swell up, icepack wedged between my legs.
Feel free to come up your own moral for this story as I contemplate spending my most awesome day of days doing some serious day drinking.
TL;DR Day drinking pantless is not as much fun as I thought it would be after drawer tries to bite my balls off