This happened less than twenty minutes ago.
As I sit here typing with trembling fingers in the classroom where I teach ESL to adults, I cannot help but think that this is one of my most embarrassing teaching moments.
Today I decided to wear my favorite burgundy-colored pencil skirt to class. This morning was a rough one; The type of morning where you barely drag yourself out of bed...
and of course we were completely out of coffee. So I half-consciously dressed myself, admire my outfit efforts in the mirror for a split second, and dart out the door late as usual.
When I get to class my students were waiting patiently at their desks. Not wanting to waste any time, I walk up the the board and immediately begin to write and lecture.
About five minutes into my lecture one of my female students from Colombia says, "Excuse me, *teacher*...
" Irritated at the interruption, I retort, "Yes, student? Remember I'll leave time for questions always." "No, your.. um... how do you call...
?" "ZIPPER!" say several other students to help the first.
I turn around like lightning and feel with my hand that although the clasp still held,
the zipper that ran from the top of the skirt all the way to the bottom of my butt was as wide open as the great outdoors.
I casually zip it up, thank the student, and^dead^inside continue my lecture as if nothing had happened.
As soon as I get the class quietly working on an assignment I slip off to the bathroom to assess the damage.
In the mirror I pull the zipper down like it was, and lift my arm mimicking myself writing on the board.
To my horror my open zipper and closed clasp created a little keyhole from Satan that revealed my blue g-string and ass cheeks in all of their pasty glory.
I am now back in class; red-faced and knowing that the memory of this will keep me up at night for years to come.
**TL;DR If I don't zip the zipper, their teacher's a stripper.**
Update: Class just let out. The last student out of the classroom just said, "Blue is a good choice." Winked, and darted out the door.
Edit: I was really hoping that my 15 seconds of fame would be from something more noble than *this* crap, but c'est la vie.
Beside the haters, the overwhelming majority of hilarious comments has made me feel a LOT better.
**TIL**: "Pics or it didn't happen." Is Reddit's version of, "Hey girl, bet you can't touch your elbows together behind your back."