"I love you."
She was looking at me. Looking into me even. Her eyes wide with the soft hope that comes with saying those words. This girl, here and now, has opened up to me expecting me to do the same.
What was I to do? A girl's emotions are a frail thing, and one would have to be a monster to betray such trust.
"Do.. you love me?"
I was taking too long. The panic was starting to show in her face. Her mask beginning to slip. I know how I feel about her, but what was I to do? To say? I did the only thing I could.
The only possible choice I really had.
I lied because I didn't want to hurt her. I had seen the brief regret in her face during that silence following her question.. the doubt. I had to make it right.
I never wanted to see her sad again, never wanted to see her dreams broken. To tell the truth would be only heartless.
I have grown accustomed to her smile. Her happiness bringing me my own in a way that only the strange magic of the mind can fathom. In that moment of confession, she was so perfect..
so sure of her life. The only thing I could hope, in the most secret corners of my heart, is that she could be as happy as she was in that moment forever.
Who am I to take that away from this beautiful girl? This kind, and loving girl? I had no choice. I am not the one who deserves her affection. I was never good enough for her.
Too far gone for my own angel. What cruel god could create such a perfect human being.. and make her have pity on me?
In that moment, every fiber of my being screamed I love you too.
I love you so much it keeps me up at night.
My heart.. my mind.. my soul.. all said I love you.
I said "No."