I gotta tell you, working graveyard at a 24-hour convenience store in a sketchy neighborhood, you see some weird shit.
Like, there's this Asian guy, right, lives in the building across the street, comes in every two days and buys five boxes of the largest size of condoms — I'm talking *muy muy grande*,
Now, I'm not racist, but you know how all stereotypes are based on some truth? See where I'm going with this? First time I saw that happen, I'm literally straining *so* hard not to laugh.
Hey, don't judge me; you *know* it's funny.
And I swear that this guy is a god-damn *machine*. Every night, I look across the street and I see him with a different chick. Never the same girl twice, as far as I can tell.
Tall, short, black, white, brown, Asian, no matter; he takes them *all*.
Strange thing is, most of them look like they've packed to stay the night, but they're in and out in, like, three hours tops.
Him and them, I think they have widely different ideas about what their relationship is about. Well, at least he calls them a cab every time; fine, upstanding gentleman he is.
Y'know, I think one of these days, I'm gonna hand him a pack that I've put holes in. Shit'd be hilarious if they spilt open. You think he'd notice?
one of the girls just stepped out onto the sidewalk and then collapsed shes puking white sludgy stuff all over–
the asian guy is looking straight across the road at me