feeling pretty fucking terrible tonight.my ex tried to hit me up. i’ve blocked him on every social media platform, so he had to e-mail me.
he has nowhere to live and has been couch-surfing apparently for the past month. he asked if he could come see me. i told him i’m seeing someone.
this is sort of true, but not with a seriousness that prevents me from seeing my ex. but i had to use some sort of excuse.
my ex of course got pissed at me and tried to manipulate me into feeling guilty or shameful about it.
it’s like, i literally know what he’s doing and what exact tactic he’s using, and he still does a great fucking job of making me feel like i’m a terrible person.
so now i’m laying in my apartment with all of the lights off and just wishing that i was a different person. i hate being me. i hate it with a passion.
i did the right thing, i know, but i still hate how i feel and how empty i am.xoxo omgblonde