It was brought to my attention that 1: this subreddit existed and 2: that I should repost my Theater story here. So I am doing just that. :) Please Enjoy.
When I was in high school, one of my first jobs was working at a local movie theater.
It was brand new, and had just been built by the mall, so the theater was huge and got a lot of foot traffic from mall patrons and the like.
A lot of the time I was either an Usher, Ticket Taker, or I worked in the kitchen and made the Chicken strips, Quesadillas, hot dogs etc... for people who ordered them.
On this particular day, I was working the Host bench, a position I thoroughly enjoyed, because all I had to do was take the tickets, tear them, tell people where to go and say "Enjoy your Show!".
I also had to coordinate with the other ushers who were cleaning the theaters to know when to send guests back or if theaters were clean yet after their movies had finished.
To keep in communication with everyone, I wore a headset radio and people would relay different things over the radio, like "16 is clean" or "8 just got out" or "Men's rooms checked."
If I remember right, we had to check the Mens and Womens restrooms every hour, making sure the floors were clear, TP was stocked, Paper Towels were stocked etc....basic.
There are 4 bathrooms at this theater, 2 men's and 2 women's. So I'm standing at my podium when I hear a few commands and responses over the radio.
The conversation over the headset, thank god only I could hear it and no guest could hear it, was utterly hilarious and disgusting at the same time.
Guy 1: "Checking Men's Room"
Guy 2: "Roger that. Thanks"
~* pause *~
Guy 1: ".......oh GOD!"
Guy 2: "What's wrong?"
Guy 1: "What the hell!?"
Guy 2: "Dude, what's wrong??"
Guy 1: "There's Shit Everywhere!"
Guy 2: "What??"
Guy 1: "How'd it get on the Ceiling!? "
Supervisor 1: "What's going on?"
Guy 1: "Just....Why?!?"
Guy 2: "Apparently there's shit on the ceiling?"
Guy 1: "I don't get paid enough for this. It's like a Bomb went off in here!"
Supervisor 1: "What restroom?"
Guy 1: "Main Men's room....."
Guy 2: "On my way."
Supervisor 1: "On my way."
Guy 1: "Bring masks...this is nasty."
Me: "Can I get...a Status...on the Bathrooms...Please?"
Supervisor 1: ".......no."
I found out later that someone had had explosive shits like no one's business, and literally there was crap plastered all over the inside of the stall, the floor and yes, up on the ceiling.....
I'm just glad I didn't have to stumble across that or clean it.