And this isn’t how I intended my life to be. And now I find myself praying to a god after questioning their existence.
And just because my arms don’t cry with razor blades and my eyes don’t roll down the cliffs of depression doesn’t mean my heart beats any less.
I can’t apologise for taking off my tiara and replacing it with beads of vulgar language. This isn’t how I intended my life to be.
And maybe I longed for a hero to take me high into the skies so I could fly away to a place where my head doesn’t ache with anger.
Looking into the mirror how stupid could I have been, it’s the villain’s life for me.
And under the scars and the eyes of great china walls a villain was once good but through a simple misfortune heroes arise and hypnotise the hearts of children,
with the longing of the green beast to be defeated.
And if we were to really ponder about the heroes our parents may read before their hearts die we may find our heroes created the much hated villain’s. This isn’t the life I intended.
And you will never know how hard it is to walk alone and smile,
knowing that the ones whom surround you define you as a venomous cold hearted reptile as your heart soaks up the tears before they can escape through normal human emotions.
And oh dear you will never know what it feels like to be told you’re not good enough because you cannot fully open up.
And this isn’t the life I intended and I can admit there are days where my body aches in exhaustion and I roll over pulling up the blankets of sand dunes waiting out my time in an hour glass.
But, I can’t go, not yet. Yes, my body is frail and my mind is weighed with exhaustion. But, I’m still needed. Why else do the stars continue to shine at night?