God is a Piece of Shit
God is a Piece of Shit sad stories

alyssatatum28 my name's not philip and i'm not a poet
Autoplay OFF   •   2 years ago
does this count as blasphemy

God is a Piece of Shit

Most of the time, He's not.

Most of the time, He's just a regular God-dude, hanging out in the sky,

Ignoring Earth and chillin' with His alien buddies.

But every so often, He starts to wonder,

'What's going on down there on Earth?'

And He checks in, and remembers how boring we are compared to His alien buddies,

So He decides to spice things up, make it interesting.

Sometimes He'll start a revolution. He likes starting them in France, because France always has the weirdest rulers.

Sometimes He'll start a new era. He likes giving humans cool upgrades.

And sometimes, He sees a person walking down the street and decides that this is going to be the funniest thing He's done literally ever.

He sees this girl, and He knows she's in love with this boy, but this boy seriously doesn't like her back, and she knows it and she's accepted it.

So what does He do? He convinces the girl that maybe the boy does like her. She'll never know if she doesn't try, right?

She tells him, and he rejects her. He rejects her like she always knew he would. She cries herself to sleep that night, and she never tells anyone how bad it hurts.

Meanwhile, God's laughing His stupid ass off in the clouds, laughing at how gullible humans are.

The girl burned her algebra book the next day.

Stories We Think You'll Love 💕

Get The App

App Store