Do you know what it feels like to hurt beyond your skin, deep into your bones? But deeper than that.
It's a pain that is not pain, but actually emptiness.
And it doesn't matter what you do, you know that emptiness can't be filled. But you still try, of course. Because that's what you do.
You are strong every single day, until one day you can't. You just can't do it anymore.
They see you isolating, hurting yourself, starving...But you want to scream at them: This is how I survive. I'm doing this for you. You want me to keep on living and this is the only way I manage.
Do you know what that feels like? Tell me I'm not alone.